Monday, February 28, 2011

Your Ignorance and Pompous Objectification Makes me Both Angry and Sorrowful (Alternate Title: No, Fanny, We Don't Punch People in the Face.)

Dear Idiot in the Library,

If you would kindly shut your stupid mouth and never open it again, that would be great.  Honestly, if I never again had the misfortune of hearing you spew your bile everywhere, I would be content.  I don't want to hear about how you categorize women based on their looks.  I also don't want you to rate different girls in our school within earshot.  If you are going to be an a**, go do it somewhere else.  I don't want to hear it, and you're making it really difficult for me to not storm over there right now and punch you in your stupid face, because maybe, just maybe, if I punch you hard enough, it'll knock the stupid right out.

Knock it off, or I'm coming for you.

All my love,

Sunday, February 27, 2011

The Spoils of War (Alternate Title: Pizza Without Humiliation: The Strange New Phenomenon)

So, the week before last week, on Thursday, my class won the minute to win it competition, and so we earned a pizza party.  Now, as you may or may not know, I usually only get pizza in school after losing a competition, so this was a new experience for me.

Anyway, during lunch, we got our reward pizza, and it was wonderful.  The Stellar Miss Moon, the King/Archbishop of Marching Band and I shared a pizza, but we were not able to finish all of the pieces, so we got to take the pizza home. 

From the fact that we got to keep the pizza came the idea for an after-school pizza party at the King/Archbishop of Marching Band's house.  I don't think any of us really thought that it was really going to happen, but we still talked about it.

Well, anyway, a couple of hours passed, and suddenly it was seventh hour and we were all in the library.  The Stellar Miss Moon was talking about how she really wanted to learn to play the piano, and I mentioned that I wanted to learn too, so the King/Archbishop of Marching Band said that he would teach us, but he wouldn't say when, so the Stellar Miss Moon suggested that we have our first lesson that day after school, and that way we could also have our pizza party as well. 

And so the plan was made.

Now the school day ended, and off we went the King/Archbishop of Marching Band's house.  We started out with the Stellar Miss Moon on the piano, then she had to leave for a little bit to got drop her little sister (the Minor Miss Moon) off at home, so I got to play the piano.

Now, I already have some experience with music, so it was no surprise that I was just a little better at the piano than the Stellar Miss Moon, who had almost zero musical background. 

Anyway, in the time that she was gone, I made it through the entirety of the first piano book, and I even got a certificate of merit.  Yeah, I'm kind of impressive.

My favorite part of the first piano book is this picture of a duck by one of the songs:

I think I'm in love.

Anyway, after our piano lesson (which lasted for quite some time) we decided to go to Sporcle and attempt to name the top 200 characters in the Harry Potter series by number of mentions.  We eventually managed to name something like 175 characters.  We will name them all before we graduate.  WE WILL CONQUER THAT QUIZ!

But, yeah, our thinking processes were more than a little odd.  I spent most of the time either bouncing around chanting names in time to my jumps or lying down on the floor trying to come up with just one more name.

Okay, maybe it was only my thought processes that were odd.

Anyway, after the quiz, we had our pizza party.  Now, if you're going to have pizza, you have to have something to drink.  Apparently, some time before our pizza party, the King/Archbishop of Marching Band's younger brother had drank (drunk?  Drought?  You know what, we'll just say "consumed") all of the Hawaiian punch, so we were left with very limited options.  The King/Archbishop of Marching Band went down into his basement to try and find something for us to drink.  While he was down there, he made an excited noise, then proceeded to run upstairs with a large apple juice bottle.  He paused for just a second before frowning and saying "That's not apple juice" and running back downstairs.  You see, it wasn't apple juice because it was hard apple cider in an apple juice container.

I told him that we weren't having "that kind of party."

Anyway, after we finished our pizza, we asked ourselves this question:  What would happen if our school had some sort of war and the only people who could be in your army were the kids on the honor roll in your class?

Now, even though, academically, our class is the shame of our high school, we didn't write ourselves off right away.  Our reasoning was that, even though our honor roll students were few, we were all rather cunning, and quite a few of us were pretty strong.

But, we were eventually forced to acknowledge that, despite our few strong points, we would probably never win that war, so we began to discuss our strategies, which would involve allying with the senior class, then we got completely off topic and just began drafting an army from all of the classes, including those students who weren't on the honor roll. 

It was all quite fun.

After we had done this, we watched Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban.  You know how in the movie, there's that skinny kid who's always hanging out with Malfoy and no one seems to know who he is?  Well we saw that kid, and this conversation ensued:

The King/Archbishop of Marching Band:  Who is that guy?  Does anyone know?
Me:  Maybe he's Crabbe's replacement because Crabbe got busted for drug possession.
The King/Archbishop of Marching Band:  *Looks at me blankly*  I don't remember that.
The Stellar Miss Moon:  In real life, not in the books.
The King/Archbishop of Marching Band:  Ooh.  That makes sense.

For the record, I'm not entirely sure if the actor who plays Crabbe really was busted for drug possession, or if my brain just made that up.  It does that sometimes.

Anyway, we had a grand old time watching the movie and noticing all of the attention to detail that went into that movie, and we had fun making up strange commentary and reciting the lines. 

And that was my Friday.  I'm pretty sure that there were probably more interesting things that happened, but I can't remember them, and I'm planning on going to bed pretty soon because I have to take the ACT in two days and I should really get some sleep or study or something, so yeah.  There's that.

The Trivial Pursuit of an Awesome Time

Okay, this one is probably going to be fairly short because this all happened over a week ago and I'm just now getting around to writing it all down.

Last Thursday, (Actually, the Thursday before last Thursday, the same day that this all happened) I went out into the big city with some of my friends.  We were going to the book store to get the newest book in the Maximum Ride series.  This did not work out so well, because, when we got there, we discovered that the book cost nearly $20.

We all decided it would be better if we waited for it to come out in paperback.

After we had the encounter with the expensive book, we wandered around the store for a couple of hours, turning around magazines and romance novels so that the scantily clad women (and, occasionally, men) would not be showing.  We also had a mini-strategy meeting to plan for the zombie apocalypse and played with puppets and stuffed animals. 

We also mocked Twilight, but we do that all the time, so it wasn't really a special thing.

Anyway, we spent quite a bit of time in that book store.  We also found the voodoo section, which creeped me out a lot.  (Why did they even have a voodoo section anyway?  Barnes & Noble doesn't pull this crap.  At least, I don't think they do.  I wouldn't really know; I don't spend much time in Barnes & Noble because it's too expensive for me, and when I do go there, I usually just stay in the young adult section.  This is turning out to be a really long side comment.  I will stop it now.)

After we left the book store, we decided to go out to eat.  My belly was crying out for rice, but everybody else wanted burgers, so we stopped at this one place that was like a mini-mall of food.  I went to a Chinese restaurant to get some chicken fried rice and they all got burgers at the Burger King across the parking lot. 

The Stellar Miss Moon went with me to get my rice.  I had recently exhausted all of the paper money in my wallet by purchasing my prom dress, so we paid for my rice in change.  We ended up being four cents short, but the nice lady working the cash register said it was fine. 

So, we left and walked across the parking lot to the Burger King where the King/Archbishop of Marching Band and another bandie, the Drummer Boy, were already eating their food.  On the way to the Burger King, we saw that someone had driven over one of the little tree median things in the parking lot.  I was going to take a picture, but I was really hungry, and I figured that I could just take a picture after we were done eating but then it got really dark because it gets dark really early around here and also we took a lot of time eating because we kept talking about strange things (like that show "My Strange Addiction") and then I kind of forgot to take the picture and then we were already leaving and so that's why I don't have a picture of it so don't yell at me.  You'll just have to take my word for it when I say that the person who made those tire tracks was either running from some sort of danger or snockered beyond all belief.

Then we went home.  Actually, we were going to the King/Archbishop of Marching Band's house, but that's beside the point.  Anyway, on the way there we talked about more zombie apocalypse strategies and also about odd childhood memories and such.  It was all great fun. 

Then we got to the King/Archbishop of Marching Band's house and watched some YouTube videos.  (This was where I first discovered the Spizzwinks(?))  After we finished watching YouTube videos, we decided to play Trivial Pursuit.  The Drummer Boy kept buying his wedge things (The King/Archbishop of Marching Band has a fancy new Trivial Pursuit that lets you bet on whether or not the person will get the question right and also allows you to buy a wedge if you land on a certain space.)  We all insisted that this was cheating; he insisted that it was strategy.  It didn't matter anyway, though, because the Stellar Miss Moon won in the end, but not before this little gem of a conversation happened:

The King/Archbishop of Marching Band: The category is sports.  The theme is: golf
Me:  Is the answer Arnold Palmer?
The King/Archbishop of Marching Band: (Without looking at the card) No.  *Looks down at card* *looks back up at me with surprised eyes* What are the two ingredients in an Arnold Palmer?

'Twas definitely one of the better parts of the night, 'twas.

Huh, I guess that wasn't really very short at all.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Zombies and Spizzwinks(?) and Facebook Stalking, These are a Few of My Favorite Things...

Here are three videos that I have been watching over and over and over again all this weekend.  I love them all very much.  I hope you enjoy.

First:  Zombie Love Song, finally, a love story with a happy ending, and guy who loves a girl for her brains.  BRAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNSSSSSSSS!!!!!

Next, the Yale Spizzwinks(?) performing "Grace Kelly" (originally by Mika), I absolutely love that this guy can hit those high notes.

And, last, but most certainly not least, The Facebook Skit, which I was introduced to by the Wonderful Miss Funshine.  Oh, how I love her.

Snowpacalypse 2011, Part Deux

So, a couple of weeks ago, we got massive amounts of snow here in my humble little town (okay, not really massive amounts, but it was enough to cancel school for two days, so I'm not complaining.)  That was Snowpocalypse 2011, Part One, which spawned this conversation between my sister and me.  Well, anyway, that snow stuck around for a while, but then it melted because things were getting a little warmer 'round these parts, and I guess the snow couldn't take the heat.

So, all the snow melted, and it was starting to feel a little like spring.  Hoorah, it's spring come early, right?  No.  Not at all.  You see, even though it felt like spring, and there were even some bugs wandering around trying to verify this notion, it was not really spring at was nature trying to lure us all into a false sense of security. 

So, nature lets it get all nice and sunny and above freezing temperatures, then I go and take a nap and wake up four hours later and BAM: a full-on blanket of snow as far as the eye can see.  It was at around four inches when I got up from my nap, and it just kept coming.  It snowed all through the night, and even a little into the morning.

It snowed so hard that we got another snow day after our already long (4-day) weekend.  Which is awesome, because that means that I didn't have to do my pre-calc homework yesterday. 

But, yeah, pretty much anything fun that was supposed to be going on in the past few days (at least, in my case) has been cancelled due to the weather, so I am forced to have Disney Movie Marathons in my house with my sisters and our pathetic Disney collection (seriously, we don't even have Mulan.  What Disney fan doesn't have Mulan?)

So, basically, I'm trapped in my house with nothing to do except watch movies, do my homework, and waste time on the computer for at least the next twelve hours, so I might get another post up today.  Maybe.

Friday, February 18, 2011

Blogger Makes me Look More Responsible Than I Am

It says that I posted this around midnight, when I actually posted it much later. (Ooh, I'm so bad.)

Thursday, February 17, 2011

In Memory of the Fearsome Miss Ginger, Who Passed Into Beyond the Beyond Today, Then Passed Back Into the Realm of the Living, and Then Passed Her Way Right on Out of the School.

It was a SADD thing.  There were a couple of SADD members who went around all day, pulling other SADD members out of class every 30 minutes and taking them somewhere to die (read: get their faces painted white and put on a black T-shirt with some anti-drunk driving/texting while driving/doing drugs while driving message.)  My beloved friend, the Fearsome Miss Ginger, who is the elder sister of the Wonderful Miss Funshine, was one of the first to go.  'Twas very sad indeed, especially because she's married (read: "married" [as in fake married]) to the King/Archbishop of Marching Band, whom she left a widower.  She also left the Wonderful Miss Funshine a sort of half-orphan, because the Fearsome Miss Ginger and the King/Archbishop of Marching Band are the Wonderful Miss Funshine's parents in this whole odd familial situation.  The King/Archbishop of Marching Band had to get a second job as a ballet teacher to support his family after this incident. 

Aside from the "death" of my friend, the day was rather entertaining.  We had a pep rally for the last ninety minutes of the school day.  I have yet to meet someone who has been able to explain to me exactly why we had a pep rally, but I guess I don't really care that much anyway. 

Getting back to what I was actually talking about, the pep rally consisted of a series of odd tests of skill (skill?)  Okay, so they weren't really tests of skill, they were just kind, I don't know exactly what they were, but suffice it to say that it consisted of many mini-challenges that pitted all of the classes against each other.  My class won, and now we get a pizza party.  I was actually part of the festivities for one of the little contests.  In that contest, we had to bounce pencils into four different cups.  We had to get one pencil in each cup in order to win.

I sucked at it.

The game gave me the impression of being something that some of the students who are, shall we say, a little more versed in the ways of partying, would be better at.  From this assessment, I drew the conclusion that the King/Archbishop of Marching Band and I, as card-carrying teetotalers, would be absolutely awful and that we would achieve a failure so catastrophic that we would either be forever shamed, or the universe would collapse in on itself.

I was only half right.

You see, as it turns out, the King/Archbishop of Marching Band had a hidden talent for this game.  It was kind of impressive.  Meanwhile, I was on the other side of the table trying to get a stupid pencil to land inside of the one cup for the entire duration of the contest.  The Stellar Miss Moon kept trying to cheer us on, but I just told her to shut up (in a nice way.  In my group of friends, verbal abuse is a sign of love.)  Here is a little snippet of the dialogue between the King/Archbishop of Marching Band and myself during the competition:

The King/Archbishop of Marching Band:  *Says part of some sort of prayer*
Me:  St. Michael the Archangel, defend us in battle!
The King/Archbishop of Marching Band:  Defend us!
*Pencil lands in cup*

It was definitely one of the cooler moments of my day (the school day, anyway.  I went out and did some fun things with some friends, which I may put into another post.  It depends on just how motivated I am.)

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Hey, Guess What? I'm a Millionaire. (Alternate Title: The Weekend of Great Quotes)

Last Friday, I went out to the big city with the Stellar Miss Moon and two other girls from my class, who, for privacy's sake, we will call Miss Thang and the Concentrated Miss Awesome.  We were going to get supplies to use to design the center pieces for the tables at prom.  On the way there, there were a bunch of birds on the side of the road, prompting me to say this:

Me:  Birds! (Like Bambi says it)

Which got this response:

The Concentrated Miss Awesome:  You sound like Rudolf!
Miss Thang:  It's Bambi, you dumb***

Why, yes, I did just censor my own blog.  Yes, I know the asterisks aren't fooling anyone.  No, I don't care.

Anyway, on that trip we got all sorts of cool things for the centerpieces, then we went to Wal-mart, because the Concentrated Miss Awesome needed to get something.  There were Wal-mart brand unmentionables right out there in the open for all to see, which just goes to show that Wal-mart is just as classy as I thought it was. 

Anyway (I'm getting off topic all over the place here), at some point in our Wal-mart trip, The Concentrated Miss Awesome and I got separated from the Stellar Miss Moon and Miss Thang.  When we found them again, they regaled us with tales of their adventures.  Apparently, they were lost and were standing next to an African-American gentle man and had this conversation:

Miss Thang:  We're going to be lost forever!  We'll be lost children we're going to end up on milk cartons!
Anonymous Gentleman:  HA!  Milk cartons!  Have you seen this woman?

He thought the milk carton comment was extremely hilarious.

After we left Wal-mart, Miss Thang tripped on a random potato in the parking lot, and we also found a lot of other abandoned foodstuffs, which caused us to think that maybe, just maybe, the people who shop at Wal-mart aren't the most responsible or careful with their produce.

That's pretty much all that I remember about Friday.  On to Saturday!

On Saturday I went to a place that sells ice cream and such in one of the neighboring towns.  I went with some of my friends, Pipsqueak McGee, the King/Archbishop of Marching Band, the Stellar Miss Moon, and her sister, the Minor Miss Moon.  On the way there we had a conversation that went a little something like this:

Somebody:  Shake what your mama gave you!
The King/Archbishop of Marching Band:  Okay!  My mom just got me these new maracas!
Everyone:  *Ridiculous Laughter*

So that was fun.

But that's not even close to being the best quote of the night.

Some other memorable parts of the night were when Pipsqueak McGee shoved another kid into a bar stool and he tripped and nearly fell on his face.  Another one is when Pipsqueak McGee had a "beginning-life crisis."  But those still are not the best memories of the night.

No, by far, the best part of the night was when the King/Archbishop of Marching Band, the Stellar Miss Moon, and I decided to play The Game of Life. 

It started out innocently enough.  We all went to college and got decent jobs (I was a lawyer, the King/Archbishop of Marching Band was a veterinarian, and the Stellar Miss Moon, who got the worst job out of all of us, got the accountant.)  The Stellar Miss Moon had difficulty pronouncing the word "veterinarian," so she and the King/Archbishop of Marching Band had this conversation multiple times:

The Stellar Miss Moon:  Vetinarian
The King/Archbishop of Marching Band:  No.  It's "vet-er-i-narian"
The Stellar Miss Moon:  Vetinarian
The King/Archbishop of Marching Band:  *glares*

So, yeah.  That happened.

After we all had our decent jobs, the next step was to get married.  I got married first (at that point, I took my pink lady player piece and put her in the passenger seat and forced my husband to drive), then it was the King/Archbishop of Marching Band, who eloped (he IS a veterinarian) and then it was the Stellar Miss Moon.  One of the little pink lady people things fell on the floor at one point and the King/Archbishop of Marching Band was crawling on the floor looking for it when he gave us this quote:

The King/Archbishop of Marching Band:  I'm crawling on the floor looking for tiny pink women.

We all thought it was hilarious. 

Anyway, after we were all married, the King/Archbishop of Marching Band was the first to have kids, a set of twins whom I forced him to name Jude and Rita.  The King/Archbishop of Marching Band ended up having at least three kids, the Stellar Miss Moon had three and I had one because, apparently, I'm barren when we play Life.  The King/Archbishop of Marching Band kept falling out of his car, which caused us to joke that he was "snockered" (snockered means "drunk" for those of you who didn't know)

We switched jobs around a bunch of times because we all kept getting fired.  I eventually got to be the doctor, but then I got fired and went back to lawyer, and I kept that for the rest of the game.  The Stellar Miss Moon ended up as the veterinarian and the King/Archbishop of Marching Band ended up as the doctor.

After a while, we finished the game, me a lonely old woman with one failure child (who we decided had joined a freaky cult with her punk-rock boyfriend instead of going to college) and no grandchildren (although my one daughter might have had children that I don't know about while she was in the cult,) the King/Archbishop of Marching Band with his three or more children who each owned a different Ivy League college, even though none of the children had actually attended college, and the Stellar Miss Moon with her three wonder children who all went to college and would probably support her in her old age.

However, I won the game of life because I had the most money (2.16 Million dollars.)  I think that the Stellar Miss Moon Came in second with 1.85 Million dollars, and the King/Archbishop of Marching Band came in third with 1.635 Million dollars (or something like that). 

But that was still not the best part of the evening.

Oh, no.  By far the best quote of the night happened while we were playing Life.  I now present to you the funniest moment I have experienced in months:

The King/Archbishop of Marching Band:  *Holds $5,000 bill in the Stellar Miss Moon's direction*  Last night was great
Us:  *Raucous laughter that lasts for quite some time*
Other People in the Room:  *look concerned for our mental and physical health*
Us:  *Laughter dies down*
The Stellar Miss Moon:  I still want that $5,000 dollars
Us:  *Laughter begins anew and continues to last for quite some time*

And that, my friends, was my weekend.  I hope you enjoyed it.

Monday, February 14, 2011

Happy Feast of the Patron Saint of the Plague!

Oh, yeah.

It's St. Valentine's Day.

Can you feel the love?  (Seriously, can you?  Because I'm totes sending some out to you right now.  You feel that?  That warm, fuzzy feeling in your heart right now?  That's my love coming to you.  THROUGH THE INTERNET.)

So, I decided to be a giant cheese ball today and hand out valentines to everyone.  Well not everyone everyone, but a lot of people nonetheless.  I also drank 16 oz. of Nos in a thirty-minute time span and now I have the shakes.  I was feeling a little faint too, but then I ate two graham crackers and now I'm fine.

Anyway, I've got another post that I'm working on about my weekend, so that should be forthcoming.  Also, I have the ACT in two weeks, so I've been studying flash cards and that's why I'm using strange words today.  Also, I'm running on five and a half hours of sleep and 16 oz. of Nos, so I'm a little flighty and unfocused.  Plus, I'm a little verbose at the best of times, so the lack of sleep is only making it worse.

Was there a purpose to this?

I'm not sure.

Well, anyway, happy Valentine's Day!  (Even if you don't have a Valentine.  I don't have one either.  We can be each others' Valentines!  What a plan, what a plan.)


Okay, so apparently, unbeknownst to me, St. Valentine got bumped from his feast day, so that means that the title of this post is inaccurate.  I'm going to leave it that way, though.  Somebody's gotta show St. Valentine some love.

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

An Open Letter to Some of the Girls in my Economics Class

Dear Girls,

Seriously?  Passing notes?  Did I fall into some black hole and suddenly we're back in middle school?  I can only guess at the contents of the note.  I assume that it looked something like this:

Are you my bestest friend?
Check one

Because, honestly, I can't think of any other message that could possibly be sent through a note.  Anything more serious, and you would have taken the initiative to ask before class in person, or you would have at least whispered it across the one desk that separates you.

Hold on, this response is taking a little longer than it should have.  Perhaps the message in the note merited a more in-depth response than I had previously estimated.  My new guess as to the message:

I like ponies.  Do you like ponies?  Please answer yes or no, and then explain your reasoning.

Still completely worthless, but it requires a little more effort to answer.

Wait, what's this?  Another note!  What could this one say?  I have a guess:

Yes, I do suppose that that is a good reason to dislike ponies, but I hardly think that we should have a mass pony massacre so that we can feast on the flesh of our conquest.  Perhaps you should just avoid ponies.

Then they stopped passing the note, so I have no further guesses as to what their conversation was about.  

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

It's a Little Early for Cabin Fever to be Setting In...

I just spent half hour in a conversation with my sister that went a little something like this:

Me:  Knock knock
Sister A:  Who's there?
Me:  Banana
Sister A: *Refuses to answer*
Me:  Knock knock
Sister A: *Sighs*  Who's there?
Me:  Banana
Sister A:  Banana who?
Me:  knock knock
Sister A:  Who's there?
 ---Several minutes elapse---
Me: knock knock
Sister A: *Looks disappointed in me* Who's there?
Me:  Orange
Sister A:  Orange who?
Me:  Orange you glad I didn't say banana?  *Dissolves into fit of insane laughter*
Sister A:  *Shakes head at me*
---A few seconds later---
Me:  *Gets on facebook and goes to Sister A's wall*  Knock knock
Sister A:  Punch in the face
Me:  Knock knock...

This went on for quite some time, in real life, on facebook and via text.  She's extremely annoyed with me, but I can't remember the last time I laughed so hard.

I Have 51 Recently Added Songs on Shuffle on My iPod and Two Hours With a School Netbook. Let the Slacking Begin.

Today is probably the best day I've had in a while.  I'm feeling well rested, I don't have any homework that I have to do, I have all sorts of fancy new songs on my iPod and I get to play music tonight. 

Chances of complete mental breakdown are shockingly low today.  Hooray!

Ridiculous amounts of snow are coming tonight.  Maybe, if I'm a good girl and do all of my chores, the magical snow man will grant me my first-ever blizzard. If only, if only.

That's all I have for right now.  I might update this several times in the next two hours just because I have nothing better to do.

--The first update--

I just realized that today is the first day of February.  When I realized this, I immediately felt the need to inform you all (in case you didn't know.)

Now that I'm here, I might as well ramble.  Either my allergies are acting up, I have pinkeye or something horrible has happened to my left eye (the same eye Gollum was stabbing the other night) because it is all red.  I doubt that it is pinkeye, but the allergies thing wouldn't surprise me.  My allergies are evil and like to punish me for existing.  Sigh.

I'm going to go waste more time now.  I'll probably be back soon.

--The Second Update--

It's Disney movie soundtrack time.  I'm on the Beauty and the Beast right now.

These wooden library chairs are not overly comfortable, but I'm too lazy to go over and sit on the couches.  There's also another person on one of the couches, so I'm not even going to go there.  People scare me, unless they are my close friends.


I thought I'd share with you some conversations that I had with Sister A over the past few days.

Okay, the first one takes place while we were watching Degrassi (because we have a genetically inherited compulsion to watch awful movies and television programming.)  We had been watching for a little while at this point, and there was a tiny little advertisement for the next episode in the lower left-hand corner of the TV.  It said "Peter Turns to Meth."  Anyway, after the little advertisement thingy, I went to go take a shower, then I went to do something else, then I went to go brush my teeth in the bathroom next to the room Sister A was watching Degrassi in, so I could hear the TV.  I heard someone on the TV say something about Peter, and this conversation ensued:

Me: Is Peter still on meth?
Sister A:  Yeah, right now he's in the middle of an intersection.
Me:  Oh, that's cool

*Time passes, and a commercial for the new season of Degrassi comes on*

Sister A:  Hey, Fanny, I think they're going to kill another person on Degrassi.
Me: Is it going to be at the same place where Eli killed his girlfriend?
Sister A:  Maybe...wait, what?
Me:  The place where Eli killed his girlfriend.
Sister A:  Wait, Eli killed his girlfriend?
Me:  Well, he got into a fight with his girlfriend, then she drove off and got into a car accident.
Sister A:  Then he didn't really kill her, right?
Me:  Well, no, but he blames himself for her death, because if they hadn't been fighting, she wouldn't have driven off and gotten into an accident and died.
Sister A: Eli has some serious problems.
Me:  He does, indeed.

Here's another conversation we had. 

Me: *Walks into room Sister A is in*
Sister A: *Holds camera up to me*
Me:  You'd better not be taking a picture of me
Sister A:  I'm not taking a picture
Me:  Is it a video, then?
Sister A:  It's not a video
Me:  Lying makes the baby Jesus cry.
Sister A: .....Do you want me to stop it, then?
Me:  Yes.

I apologize if these conversations were not funny at all, they were hilarious at the time.

OOH!  Here's a bonus one from last night with me and the King/Archbishop of Marching Band

King/Archbishop of Marching Band:  I'm already planning on a snow day on Wednesday
Me:  Oh, yeah.  It's totes already called in my mind.  Mr. Science AND Mr. Math are predicting a snow day on Wednesday, so it's pretty much set in stone already.
King/Archbishop of Marching Band:  Yeah, I don't know what I'll do if we have school on Wednesday
Me:  If I don't go on some sort of homicidal rampage, I'll probably just wander around aimlessly, like "Why am I here?  There wasn't supposed to be school today."
King/Archbishop of Marching Band:  I wouldn't put it past our school though.  What if we had school on Wednesday and then on the last day of school there was some sort of Anthrax scare?
Me:  Not at our high school!  Everything here is hunky-FRICKIN'-dory!

Okay, you probably had to be there.  But, I assure you that it was actually fairly hilarious.

--The Third Update--

It's Hercules time now.  I love the muses.  This reminds me of the Great Disney War of Sophomore Year.  'Twas late in the year of Two thousand aught nine, and we were in the library.  The Stellar Miss Moon, the King/Archbishop of Marching Band and I were discussing Disney movies, when we got on the topic of our favorite Disney movies and which Disney movie was the best.

The Stellar Miss Moon was all for the Lion King, whereas The King/Archbishop of Marching Band thought Pocahontas was far superior.  I sided with the King/Archbishop of Marching Band, because I like to argue with the Stellar Miss Moon.  Things were getting pretty heated within the argument, with the King/Archbishop of Marching Band asserting that Pocahontas was better because Pocahontas could fly.  The Stellar Miss Moon adamently denied this, saying that Pocahontas simply "fell with style" off of the top of the waterfall.

Somehow, in the course of this conversation, a war was born.  We took Pocahontas and the Stellar Miss Moon took the Lion King, then we just started building up armies of Disney characters with which to battle each other. 

'Twas extremely fun and slightly violent, with more than a few threats being thrown across the table and within the halls. 

This went on for about a week, with the King/Archbishop of Marching Band and I calling as many villians, monsters, magical beings and simply awesome people we could think of, and the Stellar Miss Moon calling as many as she could think of.

We totally would have beat her.  She says it wasn't fair because we had a team of two and she just had herself, but she's the one with the huge collection of Disney movies in her living room and she's supposedly this Disney expert, so I think she was just looking for an excuse.

--The Fourth Update--

I'm on to Pocahontas.  It's almost time for lunch!  YAY, CHEAPLY MADE FOOD!!!!! :D:D:D:D:D:D

Could you tell that those exclamation points and smiley faces were sarcastic?  'Cause they were.

I've been reading funny things and laughing to myself for the past few minutes.  The people here must think I've finally cracked.

--The Fifth Update--

I just got snubbed by the Stellar Miss Moon.  She came into the library and didn't even say hi.  I feel so unloved.