It may surprise you all to learn that I was not always the top of the popularity totem pole like I am today. (That was sarcasm, in case you didn't already deduce as much.) No, back in the days of Kindergarten, I was actually more of a social outcast than I am right now.
You see, when I was very young, I didn't get out very much. I mostly stayed at home with my imaginary friends or some of my cousins. I didn't have fancy play dates with neighborhood children who were around my age. No, it was mostly me, my imaginary friends, and my dog (actually, we had two dogs, but I severely disliked one of them, so we won't count that one.)
So, when it came time to begin kindergarten, I was completely friendless, with my social skills being, shall we say, somewhat sub-par. As you can imagine, my social situation did not improve much upon being thrust into a room full of strangers and told to "make friends."
Well, in spite of everyone's best efforts, I did not magically transform into the kindergarten social queen. I did, however, manage to become that shy kid that plays next to the large group of children instead of having to ask to play with them, because A: kids are freaking scary, and B: I didn't want to feel like a complete and total loser.
So, I would play next to kids and try to institute myself in the goings-on of other children, only to be completely ignored. This continued for quite some time. In fact, I have a distinct memory from my childhood that perfectly demonstrates this, so I am going to share it with you now.
It all began on the playground. It was recess, and recess was always the worst because it was the one time of day when no one was forced to interact with me, so I was left alone on the playground. It was rather cold and a little wet outside, because it had rained in the past few days. Now, I had been fortunate enough that day to acquire a kickball, which I used as a chair, of sorts.
So, there I was, alone on the playground, sitting on a kickball to keep from getting my pants wet, when, all of a sudden, one of my classmates walks up to me.
Oh boy, I thought, someone is going to ask me to play with them! Now I won't have to be alone! Oh, this is going to be great!
"Hey," the kid said.
I looked up expectantly.
"Can we have that kickball?"
I was heartbroken, but I tried not to show it. "Sure," I said, and gave him the kickball.
I spent the rest of recess sitting on the wet pavement.
Kindergarten sucks, and I don't even know why I wrote all of this. I promise a less depressing post tomorrow or some time soon.